2013: Embracing Change

2013 has well and truly kicked off and I am excited and maybe a little bit anxious about the changes that are taking place this year.  Change isn’t something I welcome easily into my life.  I like routine, I like to control things and I like to know what’s going on.  Unfortunately, life doesn’t work like that and as much as I would sometimes prefer things to stay the same, change (both intentional and unintentional) is essential so that we can keep moving forward and continue to learn and grow.

Andrew’s work situation has taken a new direction which we will have to get used to.  It’s a little bit scary but on the other hand, he can now be more flexible with his schedule and create a better work/life balance for himself.  It will be tough getting things going at first but the door is now open to new opportunities and this can only be a good thing.  I know we will be thankful about this change in the not so distant future.

Chloe is old enough now for me to focus on growing my business further. I have been working with a few clients on and off since Chloe was born but now that she is older and Emma is starting full time school, I have the capacity to take on regular work which will be great.  In the beginning, it was hard work setting up my business and getting those first few clients and now, after taking time off for maternity leave, I pretty much have to start all over again.  As challenging as it is going to be, I am looking forward to meeting new clients and working hard on new projects.

Emma is off to full-time school this year and this will be a huge change to our weekly routine.  I am so used to having her around and it will be difficult to get used to.  It’s not long now until her first day and I am savouring every moment of these final weeks.  We are planning another special ‘Mummy-Emma day’ very soon.  Can’t wait!

With all these changes afoot, I have also been putting a lot of thought into life and how change can be a wonderful thing.  Over the years, I have made New Year resolutions but they have always been the same – drink more water, exercise more, eat better, blah blah blah.  This year, I want to focus on making changes and actioning all the realisations I have made over the past few years to create a more positive and fulfilling 2013.

I have always worried about what people think and this is a very inhibiting and unnecessary trait to have.  In many cases, it has held me back from doing what I really want to do in fear of criticism or retribution.  But this year, I am trying hard not to worry about all that and instead do what is right and suitable for me.  As long as I am happy and not hurting anyone (as if!) why should my actions or how I live my life bother anyone else?   I am entitled to my own way of thinking just as everyone else is and at my age, I don’t need anyone’s approval for anything.

I also want to lose the self doubt and fear of failure that has plagued me since childhood.  If you watched the Golden Globe Awards, I really got a lot out of Anne Hathaway’s speech when she won the Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actress in Les Misérables.  She said ‘Thank you for this lovely blunt object that I will forevermore use as a weapon against self-doubt.’  In 2013, I am on the hunt for one of those weapons for myself and when I find it, I will let you know.

Something I already started in 2012 and carried into the New Year is to focus more on happiness and to show gratitude for all the good things that enter our lives this year.  I have created a ‘Good Things Jar’ for our family which we will fill with notes of all the good things that happen.  On the 31st of December, we will empty it and be reminded of all the amazing things that happened to us this year.  I just hope the jar is big enough!

While showing gratitude is a very important change I want to continue with this year, on the flip side, I also want to let go of things (and people) who are a drain on my time and energy. Life is too short to waste on those who are undeserving of my time.  I want to live an abundant life filled with those people who love and care about me and my family, who bring joy into our home and who feel the same about us in return.  Sometimes, as much as you might wish you didn’t have to, you need to call a spade a spade and just let go.

Over the past 9 years, Andrew and I have created a lovely home for us and our girls and instead of spending all our spare time cleaning and working on it, I want to consciously take time out each week to enjoy our space the things we have in it.  We spent several days over Christmas and New Year doing just that and it was so wonderful and peaceful.

Sometimes, I get lazy even with the things I love doing so a big change I have already made is to pour more of my heart into the things I love.  I joined an exercise Bootcamp late last year which I go to every week at a park near my house.  The trainer and ladies I work out with are great and without even putting much thought into it, I have found my love for exercise again.  I am feeling so inspired to create a healthier lifestyle and feeling this good is exciting!  I am really enjoying having more energy and feeling more motivated each day.

I have been extremely lazy with my writing and over the coming weeks, I am looking forward to making more time to focus on my blog and other writing projects.  I want my writing to become a habit, not a chore and I have put things in place to make this so.  I am truly grateful to everyone who has ever read or commented on my blog.  It makes me inspired to write and to share more.  As I have mentioned before, this writing has been very healing for me and is the perfect way for me to pay more attention and look at life more deeply every day.  My intention is to show the world that special needs really is OK.  Sure, there are challenges but our lives are just as ‘normal’ as everybody elses.  We are truly lucky.

May 2013 bring you all lots of love, happiness and positive change – both intentional and unintentional.  Here’s to the excitement of change and the challenge to embrace it!  Cheers!